Beastly tales of the infamous kind

 Claws and beaks of every shape and size; horns and tusks of varying strength and sharpness, jostled for a seat around the Great Council Rock. As the owl hooted the midnight hour the King of the forest strode in, accompanied by his lackey, the jackal. Seating himself on the hide of a buffalo he had smote in the spring, the great king began:

 “Brothers who trod and sisters who fly,

When the world began, the Great Spirit had driven Eve out of Paradise. She and her man felt so naked that they sewed leaves to cover their shame and embarrassment. From then on, man and beast never looked in the eye without fear and mistrust. Once again man is becoming naked and wild because of his obsession with sex! Our reliable scouts, the jackal and the wolf fear that mankind might invade the forest and dispossess us of our habitation, in their search for kinkier experiences. I’ve summoned this great assembly to discuss and deliberate on this impending threat.”

“Have you, Akela, ever made love to your babies?” questioned the king with gravity that only he could assume.

“Your Highness,” began Akela, sounding very indignant. ”we are not pretending to be as intelligent as man, but we do know how to respect the lassies of the pack .Every male abides by the law of the pack: that however frisky the young girls in the pack might appear, they are not to be ravished, until their time!”                                    

 “Wise Owl,” called out the king, “ enlighten the noble assembly why infants, teens and grannies are assaulted in human society from your study entitled, ‘Civilized Jungle Society,’ that you spoke to me of.”

“O King,” began the Owl, sounding very important, “sexual liberation is the culprit! It is aided by something called Android phone. It is a simple device with a screen. Punch a few keys, my Lord, and you will get all types of love: birdie–love, doggie-love, homo-love, child-love et al! I call it SEX-PLOSION, my Lord. There are videos by sexperts and perverts to titillate and to shock.”

“Wait! Wait!” dear owl, interrupted the bison, looking elegantly polished in his freshly bathed skin.” My Lord,” he began in earnest.”I had to butt in before I forget. You know how short-lived bison -memory is!” “While I was siring my Daisy in a secluded clump the other evening,” he continued,” a cheeky, wandering hatter took pictures of us , and being in the heat of the act, we ignored the flashes sailing around us. This shameless creature captured our entire act and uploaded it. And guess what? A million people viewed it and it became an internet sensation, under the title: ‘Hot bison love!’”        

 “Shame, Shame!” the forest reverberated with the echo of voices, big and small. ”Leave alone watch, do we ever speak about our private moments, even to our brothers and sisters?” wondered the spindly giraffe, aloud.”I wish the man had acted wiser, than a bison on heat!” trumpeted the elephant sarcastically.

“To share a little more from my study,” began the owl pompously, “the internet has hooked the young and the old. The children are not running, skipping or playing, to build their bodies like our calves, cubs or pups. The adolescents are not nurturing their mind or training their will. They are engrossed in preening to look sexier than their competitors, to get adulation, adoration and validation. The adults are not tending their homes with devotion, but are flirting on the sly! Sex-craze has overtaken drink-craze and food-craze! Salivating with lust and fattened by unhealthy lifestyle, man has turned his gaze upon everyone named – female! ! It does not matter whether it is a baby left unattended, a bubbly, little girl skipping to school, a reluctant maiden returning from work, or a granny alone at home. Perverts and voyeurs are at every bend and clump.” I know I’ve been a bit raw in my expression, my Lord, but it expresses my seething anger and profound anguish.”

 “You have heard the wise owl,” began the Great Lion.”Earlier men were ruled by their heads and they lived in harmony with Nature. Now, they are governed by their basal instincts, confirming the great fear, I had alluded to, in my introductory address.””I propose that we submit a memorandum to the Great Spirit, urging Him to send another sign, like the Great Floods, to chasten the errant man.

 There was a great murmur of approval among the birds and beasts. Suddenly, there was a mighty flapping and a powerful rush of air above the assemblage. It was the mighty eagle who gently swooped down and majestically strode to the throne of the king.”Great king”, he said,” I shall gladly take the memorandum to the Great Spirit if the assembly would so allow me.”The Owl, the spokesperson for the animals, hooted thrice to indicate the unanimous approval of the animal kingdom.

As their King left the council rock, the birds and beasts departed to their perches and caves, hoping that their homes and lifestyle would last another millennium.